Insomniac II
by themanemmaloves
Summary: OK so I decided to go multichapter, found some time to write this one and as you can see by the title, I'm continuing Insomniac. The rest of the story will be posted here and on my Tumblr, hope you like it. More Captain Swan angst.
1. Chapter 1

Insomniac II

Emma woke up on the cold ground, passed out, in the middle of nothing. She got up, wiping the dirt off her jeans and shirt, then looked around for something familiar, or _someone_, but there was no one there.

All she saw was unwelcoming, lonely nothingness. Miles and miles of dried ground with no one in her sight. The air was sufficating and the silence deafening. Suddenly, fear started creeping upon her.

Her stomach twisted and she felt her breathing getting heavier by the second. Nervously flinching at her own hitching breaths, she started turning around, hoping she'll see someone or something, anything!

But there was no one. She was alone, once again.

It was already dark when she entered the strange land that not even she heard of ever existed. It looked nothing like the Enchanted Forest, or Neverland, or from what she heard of Will's stories, not even Wonderland.

This realm felt different. Dark. And even though it seemed abbandoned and empty, Emma didn't buy it for even a second that she was truly alone.

She had no one and nothing now, she was all alone in an unfamiliar place that could potentially be dangerous. It wasn't that long ago that she was happy and safe with her family.

And then it hit her. _Her family_. She wanted nothing more then to have some kind of confirmation that they're OK and that they're safe. She wanted to know it so desperately, but there was no other way.

Emma Swan was never a person of hope, but now, she hoped with all she had left in her that they are safe, that her plan worked and that her sacrifice wasn't for nothing.

She didn't even need to get back, she just needed to know if her family and friends are alive and well.

Seeing she had no other choice, Emma started walking forward. It didn't seem to matter which direction she took, it all looked the same. Same cracked pale dirt, same thick air, same never ending horizont that was actually scary to see.

Tired as she was, soon, Emma started dragging her feet across the desert. Rubbing her arms for warmth, all that went through her head were Henry.

She wondered who was the one to tell him about what happened. She hoped he'll understand that she had to do what she did, for the sake of everyone. Darkness was creeping upon the town and she was the main target of it. There was only way to keep them all safe - she had to sacrifice herself to drag the darkness with her into a new realm the dagger would decide her to end up in. And that was here.

Now her mind went to Killian. Her heart ached when she rememberred the sound of his voice cracking, begging, her not to do this. She could feel his arms trailing over her body and his forhead pressed to hers when he put his hand gently on her damp, teary cheek.

She promised she'll return to him hoping that her words will give him the strength he'll need to get through their separation, but now, she wasn't that sure she'll be able to keep her promise but she was sure he'll keep hers.

She was cold, her pace was pale and chills were running through her body while she wouldn't stop walking.

_If I keep going and don't look back maybe I'll find a way out. _She thought.

She craved warmth and comfort but all she had was fear of the unknown and a cool breeze that left chills on each spot of her skin it touched.

She'd give anything to be next to Killian now. To settle in his embrace and stay like that for hours. He always knew what to say to her when she needed reassurance.

But Emma was definitely not planning on giving up so easily. She will fight like hell to get back to them, to hear their voices again, to be able to touch them again instead of whining to herself about how much she wanted it.

_If you want it, work for it. _She kept repeating those words to herself.

Before she realized, it was already dawn. The temperature was rising quickly and she still got nowhere. The view she had was the same one from hours ago.

She needed a break, her feet were killing her and she was too tired to stand. She sat down on the ground, dirt lingering on her finger tips as she accidentally dug them in the ground while trying to sit down.

She felt thirsty, and there was no breathing soul around her, never mind it suddenly hit her - _her magic_.

Emma closed her eyes and focused sharply, she raised her hand and twisted it, imagining a glass of water and a warm plate of grilled cheese. When she opened them, there was nothing there.

„What the-?"

She though her magic didn't work because she didn't focus well enough, so she tried again. And then again and again...

Nothing happened. Emma was first confused, her desperate attempts getting more and more desperate with each try, but then she realized – _her powers were gone_.

This realm was her prison. The one where she could no longer use her powers. They were gone. Darkness inside of her was too much to handle and it got her here, where it had no effect anymore. Nothing was controlling her anymore. She was free but also trapped.

Emma stared at her shaking hands blankly, still trying to process that evenher powers were no longer of use to her.

_This was it, _she thought, _I'm going to die here_.

And she firmly believed that, one part of her mind already accepted it. Accepted that there's no way out, no one there. That she will die of either hunger, thirst or some monster will show up and kill her.

She slowly calmed her hands down until they were completely still. She narrowed her brows, brushing away every dark and hopeless thought of hers.

„No... Not like this."

She murmured to herself with determination in her voice. She was not going to give up so easily.

There were people she needed to get back to, she had promises she needed to keep, had her whole life ahead of her waiting... This wasn't the end. She was going to get back to them. Sooner or later.

* * *

This one will probably turn out longer then I excpected, I do hope you will enjoy. Probably won't end as 'This Love Came Back To Me'.


	2. Chapter 2

Insomniac III

I decided to go with describing one realm per chapter, hope you like it guys, keep in my mind this si my first multichapter fic. Captain Charming feels ahead.

_Storybrooke._

* * *

Today it felt a bit easier then most days. It was a preety busy day in Storybrooke and David needed some assitance in the Sherriff's station.

It was a good thing for Killian. He found himself to feel better when he had other stuff to do that distracted him. It wouldn't last long, but it was what he needed from time to time.

He knocked on the door and said:

„Mate, you called?"

„Yeah, I need you to help me carry these boxes back to the apartment, I need to go through them tonight, and we need to bring the other ones I finished with back here."

„What's in them?"

„Some reports from this year that Emma startde but never got to finish..."

„You couldnt've carried them yourself? There are only a few boxes here, I'm sure you can do this so much quicker with someone else other then a one handed pirate."

„Yeah I could but I kind of felt like you could use some distraction right now. We didn't hear from you in days, Hook. We got worried."

„We?"

„Yeah, Snow, Henry..."

Killian grinned at him, cocking his head and saying:

„Told you I'd grow on you eventually."

David gave him an unimpressed look and then continued:

„Look, you can pretend all you want to be handling this as well as you said you did but I'm not stupid. When was the last time you even slept, huh? The circles under your eyes are darker then your hair, you're barely able to stand on your own feet and you riek of rum."

Killian's cocky smirk faded from his face quickly. He wasn't able to look at David straight in the eye so he stared into the floor while dragging himself over tot he desk so he would sit down.

„Six days ago..."

„What?"

„Last I slept was six days ago, alright? I'm sorry if I've concerned you, I lost my talking phone awhile ago... Didn't bother looking for it and then I found it this morning by accident."

David sat down slowly next to him.

„Henry asked about you."

An honest smile now appeared on Killian's face. He felt honored that Henry has grown fond of him.

„What did he say?"

„He asked when are you going to take him sailing again. He misses you. We all do..."

David noticed nothing was enough to make Killian's mood change. Maybe reassurance was not what he needed. Maybe all Killian needed was someone to be desperate and sad with him.

„OK, how about this... Tonight you and I go out for a beer or something."

„Are you asking me out, mate?"

David rolled his eyes and said:

„Please stop... Do you want to or not? I'm not asking again."

„Aye. What time shall I pick you up?"

Killian burst out laughing and David smacked his shoulder.

„Shut the hell up."

* * *

Later, after they finished packing and unpacking the boxes, Killian returned to his ship. Tired and exhausted, like most of the time, he layed down on his bed and let out a deep sigh.

He ran his hands over his face and looked up at the ceiling. He wondered what was Emma doing at this moment. Was she OK? Is she hungry? Tired? Alive?

He just wanted to know wheter she was safe or not. All of his attempts of finding Gold to ask him where she could be failed. Gold hid himself quite well and what were the chances of him talking even if he did find him?

Killian was the last person on the planet Gold would help. This all happened because of him, because he wanted to turn Emma dark. He slowly planned out every step and made this happen.

First, Emma killed Cruella. It was to protect her boy's life whom she though was in danger, she did it to protect him, everyone would. It was the right thing to do, but it haunted Emma. Second, she was tempted to kill Lily. She was so so close to doing it, he rememberred how she described it to nerve in her body wanted to pull that trigger and to end her life, one part to protect her parents... The other just for the thrill of it.

Then, she did turn completely dark. Her entire personality changed over night thanks to Maleficent's curse she casted as a revenge. All of the things that defined Emma as the person she once was were gone.

There was no more Emma who wanted to help others, who was willing to die for their safety or Emma who was hell bent on saving everyone from the villians. Instead she became one.

She walked around the city destroying everything in her path, the darkness consumed her and she craved more. She needed more power and she flipped every rock in hope of finding it. Her head had a price on it.

The darkness within her was growing every day and the only way of getting rid of it was sending her elsewhere. A land with no magic, where she could no longer hurt anyone. The town gave up on trying to help her and everyone was after her, just as Gold intended it to be.

Everyone except her family, who were still grasping at straws in finding a way to help her. And no one could.

But when she suddenly came across Killian, who was no longer affected by the curse because he didn't give into the darkness, Emma looked at him and he felt like he could see into her soul at that moment. Dark, lifeless, cruel. Just like his, years ago.

She didn't change her expression no matter what he told her. It didn't matter he told her that this wasn't who she was, it didn't matter he told her that all of this is temporary and that power only brings pain and destruction and that one day she _will_ regret this.

She pulled out a knife in the dark alley where they talked, and pressed it to his neck. He didn't even flinch.

„_You're not going to this, Swan."_

„_Oh yeah?"_

He remembered how she pressed the knife harder to his neck, the blade brushing his artery and sending chills through his body. But he wasn't scared. She trailed it down lower and lower until she placed it over his heart.

„_What makes you think I won't drive this blade right through your heart right now?"_

„_Because this isn't you, Swan. You would never harm someone like that."_

„_Really? And why do you think that the person you fell in love with is still somewhere in me? I don't care one bit about you, pirate. I could kill you right now and I wouldn't feel a thing."_

„_So why don't you?"_

Emma froze, her brows narrowed for a split of a second and she seemed confused. Killian looked at her and continued:

„_That's what I thought. You can't. Because you do care. You always cared."_

The confusion disappeared from her face and she dug the blade a bit deeper, a line of blood appearing on his skin.

„_Be careful with your choice of words. They may be your last."_

That was the moment that Killian forgot about everything, all his fears faded away and the only thing that fueled his body was hope.

„_This better bloody work."_

In one quick movement, Killian pushed away Emma's hand from his neck, the sound of metal hitting the ground was the last thing he heard before his lips crashed into hers. A strange feeling neither of them could explain ran through both of their bodies and they realized it happened. The curse Emma had on her was broken by their true love's kiss.

She was first shocked and unable to process what happened, but not even a second later, her hands reached up and she placed them onto his neck, deepening the kiss and he could feel her gently smiling into it.

She was back. Emma Swan was back.

Thinking about it made Killian smile for a moment, one of their last kisses was a true love's one and that brought some kind of strange relief to him. He hoped that one day he'll find a way to get back to his true love. He had to.

Before he knew it, it was already night. David must be waiting for him already. He dragged himself out of the bed and walked slowly to the bar they'd meet at.

„Look who finally decided to show up..."

„Sorry. Didn't mean for it to happen. Everything I do lately seems to be wrong."

„What do you mean?"

„Last week I nearly let that thief run away after stealing your car, before that I nearly set half the woods on fire when I was trying to surprise you, Snow and Henry when getting the picnic place ready and I'm preety sure I lost a vest somewhere on my ship."

„You need to sleep Killian."

„Wish I could. My eyes won't close. You don't seem too well either mate. You're tired as much as I am, and you can pretend all you want but I can see how scared you are. You're just as terrified for your daughter's life as I am. You try to seem stronger then all of us but in reality you're just as hurt and broken. Now are you here to continue lecturing me or shall we start with the drinks? Seems like you could use some too."

David stopped trying to say anyhing else. He just told the waiter to bring them two shots.

After an hour, they started talking with less argument and with more agreement. Despite their differences, they both loved Emma more then anything in the world.

With a lot of insecurity and shaking in his voice, Killian asked:

„Do you think there's a way for her to return? Or at least a way for us to know wheter she's OK?"

„I don't know... Snow and I tried looking for answers in all sorts of books we could get from Belle. But with not knowing where she is, there's no much we can do. The fairies are clueless and we have no one else to turn to."

„I tried locating the Crocodile but given the fact that he can change his appearance into anyone, that was quite pointless. If anyone can give us answers about darkness and where it sent Emma, it's him."

„You're right..."

They sat in silence for a moment, both ran out of things to say. Killian gripped his glass harder as his thoughts went to the dark one. He ripped away enough from him already and now it happened again.

David turned to Killian and asked:

„What do you say we team up?"

„What?"

„In finding Gold. No one else has to know. We can look for him together."

„Indeed we can... It's a deal."

„Good."

They stayed in a bar a bit longer, continued planning the way they'll look for him and then parted ways. Killian headed back to the ship immideatly after.

Semi-drunk, he sat down at the docks and stared at the water. Cold breeze ran over his face and he shievered but still stayed there for a moment. His mind went to Emma, but with more hope now. Now, he was a lot more certain she'll return.

He then looked up and said:

„We'll find a way to bring you back, love. Unless you do it before us... I don't doubt for a second you will. Whatever happens, I'm not giving up. I'm not giving _you_ up, alright? Hold on to that, Swan."

He stayed there for a few more minutes then went inside. He threw himself on the bed and closed his eyes, hoping he will fall asleep at least tonight.

He failed the last six times. The encouragment of working together with David brought him some peace and the weight on his chest seemed a bit lighter tonight.

His eyes closed, and by some miracle, he soon fell asleep. His nightmares got replaced by beautiful dreams of happiness he had with Emma.


	3. Chapter 3

Insomniac IV

_Emma._

* * *

It's been a long time since Emma banished herself to this world. Well it seemed long to her, but it's been no longer then 12 days. She kept going for as long as she could, but the lack of food and water bested her. She is now unable to even move on her own.

She felt too sleepy to keep her eyes open and her body was shaking. She forgot how hunger felt after being hungry for so long. The heat was draining and she was on the edge of passing out once again.

Her head was falling against her control and just before she closed her eyes she saw a dark figure standing above her. With no energy left in her, she thought she was hallucinating and so she passed out.

Sound of water streaming beside her woke her up and she flinched, turned around to look around her and she saw no one there. But this was most definitely not the place she was at before she passed out. Her shirt was ripped on her back and she was now certain someone carried her here.

The weird thing was, all she saw when getting here was the lonely desert and nothing, litterally nothing, else in her sight. And now, it seemed like she was in a completely different realm. On her right, she saw a meadow in the distance, well at least it seemed like one.

With last of her strength, Emma pulled herself up to her knees and started crawling to the water. Once she finally got to it, she started drinking - almost violently. After she had enough, she was panting. The dizziness and her headache were still present and she still felt very weak.

Her mouth very still extremely dry and she craved more and more water, she couldn't get enough of it. Her muscles felt trembly and she was still unable to walk, biggest cause of that being the fact that she hasn't eaten a thing in two weeks.

But the good thing was that her mind was clearing slowly and she felt a bit better.

„Where the hell am I?"

The place she was at was completely different then the one she passed out in. That one was lonely, empty with nothing in her horizont. This one was next to a river and a forest, so refreshing and hope giving to see.

Her goal was getting over the river to the forest where she might find food. Trying to get up, her legs shook and she fell back on the ground. So she tried again, and again, and again. Each time it ended the same way.

Emma started wondering what would Killian say to her. He always reassured her when she needed it and right now, she was losing faith that she could get up.

He would probably say something along the lines of:

„_Come on, love. You can do this. Every step you make is a step closer to you returning home. Get up Emma."_

And she kept telling herself that. _Get up Emma_. She is strong enough and she knew it. She leaned her enire body on her hands and pushed herself up.

Her feet shook a couple more times but she stood up straight. The river wasn't deep or wide and she could walk across it preety fast. Step by step, the freezing chills spread through her entire body quick and it urged her to walk faster.

Before she knew it, she was once again on the dry land.

„Oh, thank God."

She shievered at the feeling of her still cold skin and then continued walking, with a bit troubles, but she went on. When she stepped into the forest, the first thing she saw was the apple tree with fine apples hanging from it.

It seemed too good to be true. She took one in her hand and just as she was about to rip it off, an arrow went through the apple, grazing her hand in the process, and nailed the fruit into the tree.

Emma turned around and saw a woman approaching her. She was tall and seemed tough. Her fawn skin shined in the blazing sun while she was tightening her grip on the bow in her hand.

Scared out of her mind, Emma wrapped her hands around the tree in hopes behind her back of finding something she could use to defend herself. She found nothing and the woman started approaching her.

„Who the hell are you?"

She wouldn't answer. The woman got so close to Emma, she could feel her breath dance across her forhead and it was terrifying. She raised her hand and Emma feared that she was going to hurt her, she didn't have much strength left in her to defend herself.

But the woman just grabbed the arrow and pulled it out of the tree, then backed away from Emma.

Emma let out a shaky breath, still scared of what might happen next. The woman's expression suddenly got a lot more tender, and as she was putting away her bow she said:

„Relax. I'm not here to hurt you. The apples on that tree are poisonous."

Emma was confused. She was barely able to process the words she was hearing.

„My name is Kellis. And you are?"

„Emma. Where the hell am I? Why'd you bring me here?"

„You were passed out in the middle of the desert, alone. You seemed like you were about to die. This is my forest, you're safe here. I can offer you food and a shelter if you want to."

„Why would you? You just met me, how do you know you can trust me?"

„I haven't contact with anyone but myself in centuries and I know I can't trust you. And I don't. I'm just not the kind of person who would leave a helpless human being in need out there to die when I know I can help. So do you want it or not? I'm not asking twice."

Still insecure, Emma nodded.

Kellis offered her her hand and she took it.

„But first, tell me where we are?"

„Prison world for the creatures of darkest potential. It controls all our magic abilities and neutralizes them. Time goes by very slowly. It's torturing."

„_Darkest potential?"_

The words felt like fire on her lips. This _was_ a prison world just as she suspected. _Her_ prison world.

„Are there others here?"

„No, just me."

„When did you land here? And from where?"

„I don't remember anymore. It's been so long."

„How long?"

„About 500 years. More or less. We can talk later, you need to eat,_ now_. I've a shelter just down the forest and some food there."

Still shocked from new findings and in fear that she might get stuck here for some time too, Emma nodded and let Kellis lead her. She still didn't trust her, or her story completely, but she needed her and this was the only way to survive.

„Feeling better?"

„A bit... Thank you."

Kellis was flipping the burning woods in the fire and didn't even look at Emma. Her thoughts seemed empty and she always looked distracted, but she was listening. Every question Emma asked, she answered.

Centuries of loneliness must've made her like this. To seem like a dead person trapped in a living body. Emma wondered if this was going to happen to her, the thought of it immideatly sent chills down her spine.

The silence was interrupted by the sound of a tree being hit by something or someone.

„What the hell was that?"

„Take a step back."

Emma backed away and whispered:

„You said there was no one else here."

„No, I said there's no one else here but me."

„What?"

Then, a tall dark figure appeared from the woods, it's face slowly stepping into the light the fire created, and started revealing itself. Emma's jaw dropped in shock when she saw who it was.

The person looked excatly like Kellis, in fact, she was Kellis. Same height, same dead look in her face, same scary neutral expression and same posture of her body.

Kellis took a step forward and said:

„Your attempts are of no use. You should've figured out centuries ago that you should stop trying to convince me. I will _never_ agree to doing it."

„We will see about that."

Then she just turned around and dissapeared in the darkness of the night, leaving Emma with thousands of new questions.


	4. Chapter 4

Insomniac V

_Storybrooke._

* * *

It was around 7.30 pm when Killian arrived at the Sherriff's station with some papers in his hand.

„Shall we start?"

„Now? I thought we were suppoused to continue tomorrow morning."

„Well, we were but, I thought the earlier we start the sooner we will find the Crocodile and find out where Emma is."

„Yeah, _if_ we find him."

„Who's the pessimist now, mate?"

David didn't even bother looking at him. He just continued writing the files he had left since last night and then asked:

„What you got there?"

„This is all I've found from what I've gathered about Gold since Emma's dissapearence."

Killian threw the files in front of David and he started going through them.

„The last person who saw him was the thief, Will Scarlett. When I asked where did Gold go to next, he said he entered the woods and he never saw him again. Later that day, I went into the woods myself, but found no traces of him or his magic. Do you think he may've left Storybrooke?"

„No I don't, the town is vulnerable at the moment and he'll probably look for any way to regain power over it, which we need to watch out for as well. He has to be here, we just have to find him."

David was right, it sounded a lot like something Rumplestiltskin would definitely do. He was out to hunt him down once again, but not for the same reasons as this time.

By going through with his revenge he would slip back into being the person he once was, and that was most definitely not in his interest. He's better then that and it took him over two centuries to realize it.

This time, the main _and_ only goal of his, and David's, was finding Emma.

„Did you look in his cabin in the woods?"

„Aye, he wasn't there either. For as far as we know he could look like anyone at the moment. He may've even been Will once he mislead me into the woods."

„OK, so where do you want to look for him?"

Killian started tapping his foot nervously on the floor. For a second, he got completely lost in his own mind. Then he grinned, saying:

„I know just the place."

Then he walked out. David didn't get a chance to ask anything, his words got cut before they even came out of his mouth. He just grabbed his jacket and walked out after him.

„Where the hell are we going , Hook?"

„Just follow me."

And he did. They strolled down the street and then took random turns in dark alleys David never even stepped foot through. Killian just kept walking until he stopped outside of a house.

„What house is this?"

„This is the house where Emma nearly gave up her magic. Gold sent her into the room where she was about to get sucked into the Sorceror's hat."

„Here?"

„If he's not in there, I've no bloody clue where else he might be."

„You take the front, I'll go on the back. Take this."

David handed him the gun, Killian nodded and they split up. Carefully, but still with a quick pace, Killian approached the house and as silently as he could he opened the door.

It was quiet inside, no sign of anyone so far. David entered on the back door and Killian soon saw him. They continued walking to the huge living room where the lights were turned on. The only sound they were able to hear was their own hitched breathing and the queit taps of their footsteps.

They entered it, and the minute they stepped inside they heard Gold walking up to them from behind.

Killian quickly turned around and pointed a gun to Gold's face.

„You should know by now, dearie... Guns don't work on me."

With one quick lip of his hand, both of their guns ended up on the floor and they were left completely unarmed.

„We're not here to fight you, Crocodile."

„Oh really? I think the fact that you just pulled a gun on me says quite the opposite, pirate."

„Yeah, well, we had to secure ourselves in some way."

David cut in, pushing Killian out of his way and stepped in front of Gold saying:

„We need your help."

„Oh and what makes you think I'd help _you_."

„We want to know where Emma is. After she sacrificed herself, where excatly did she go to?"

„How should I know?"

„You're the bloody Dark One, for Christ's sake, you've been under that dagger's control for centuries, I'm quite sure you know where it could send her."

Rumple stood still, his face witht the usual expression on it, he didn't fear them and they knew it. They also knew that their life was on the line and that they should choose their words carefully.

„You're right, I do. But what's in it for _me_ if I tell you the information you desire so desperately to know?"

„What do you want, Crocodile?"

He took a step back from them and started walking around the hallway, while Killian and Charming stood in wonder and a bit of fear there.

„I'm not quite sure yet but here's the deal – I tell you where miss Swan is and in return you promise me you'll do anything I ask you to do for me, and since I'm in a good mood today, I'll just ask each of you once for your services. Then you walk free."

David and Killian looked at each other with insecurity, knowing that this was a promise they can't not keep. But it was for Emma, and his answer could bring them to her, that's what mattered the most.

„It's a deal."

„Well then, make yourselves comfortable."

He pointed to the couches in the living room but Killian immideatly brushed him off.

„Will pass, thanks."

„Alright, then."

Killian clenched his jaw and tightened his fist, it was his way of preparing for the bad news. Every nerve in his body was trembling and he was barely able to focus.

„Well, first you should probably know that she is still alive."

Both of them let out a sigh of relief, but they still knew that wherever she was it wasn't good.

„Miss Swan is in a realm created solely for the beings who have the strongest potential for darkness – The Prison World. Thanks to your little stunt you pulled before her birth, she became more vulnearable to being lead into darkness then she would've been if you let it stay in her and let her deal with it on her own."

„How would she be better of with it? We did it to protect her from this."

„Well, as you can see, you just messed it all up. In that Prison World, there is only one more person. Or so I've heard off. She was one of the most visicious and cruel creatures anyone ever encountred with."

Killian murmured, with concern in his voice.

„Emma..."

„Don't worry, she's not out there to hurt your girlfriend, well one part of her isn't."

„What the devil does that mean?"

„It means that the bodies and souls of everyone who got sent in there, along with their darkness, got divided in two parts – the Light and the Dark. The Light part absorbs all the good things of the personality and the Dark part all the bad."

„Did Emma...?"

Rumple just gave a slight nod to them as a response.

„Can we bring her back?"

„No."

„What do you mean no?"

„No, as in, no one can get in or out of that world except for the creaturs destined to become it's prisoners. Like I said, the only one person ever was banished there and it's been trapped for over 5 centuries."

„What about you? You're dark enough, too dark. Why aren't you in that damned world?"

„I've been around for ages, I've found my ways."

„Killed everyone who dared to cross you?"

„Excatly. They stopped bothering after some time, even you. Plus it helped that most of them did not know about other ways despite of killinf that could end me."

„So we can still put you there?"

„Not anymore. I'm no longer the dagger's slave. Thanks to the author and his cooperation, Emma was. But since she's now gone the dagger is completely useless."

They just stood in silence, slightly shocked, slightly pissed, and a lot more hurt over the fact all their hopes got broken in one minute. They couldn't do anything to help Emma or bring her back.

„Now, if I've answered all your questions, I'm going to ask you to leave me the hell alone."

They left and neither spoke a word through their walk through the alleys.

Killian saw how mad at himself David was, although he _was_ suppoused to be, both him and Snow messed up bad.

„Mate..."

David didn't hear him, or at least he pretended he didn't.

„Mate..."

Still nothing.

Killian grabbed his shoulder and turned him around.

„David!"

„What? If you're gonna try to reassure me with your new hope crap, save it. I'm not interested, Hook."

„I'm not here to lecture you, _mate_. You messed up, big time. You took away your daughter's free will to choose the person she would become. You couldn't trust her enough to make the right choice herself, so you made it for her and it brought you here..."

„I'm very well aware of that, thanks. Is there a point you're trying to make here? Because all you're accomplishing so far is me wanting to punch you in the face."

„I know this is tearing your bloody guts out. But that is not going to help Emma. She will forgive you, we just need to find a way to bring her back home."

„Forgive us? After all we put her through? Are you serious? Even if she would, you heard what Gold said, we can't bring her back, Killian. We can't. It's over."

Killian clenched his jaw once again, and David tried to calm himself down a bit.

Taking a deep breath, Killian continued:

„Knowing the Crocodile for as long as I do, there's one thing about him I always knew for certain and it never changed. He _always_ hides something. Don't you think that al of this was a bit too easy?"

„You think he's lying..."

„I know he is. The question is, are you willing to help me find out what he's hiding or shall I do it myself."

„How are we going to find out?"  
„By not letting him out of our sight, in his moment of weakness, we capture him and pull the information out of him."

David wasn't certain of his response to Killian. He wanted more then anything to bring Emma back and partially correct the mistake he made towards her.

„Deal."

They parted ways, once again soon after that. David left straight home and Killian went straight to his ship.

Instead of going straight to his room, he realized he wasn't going to get any sleep tonight so he went up to the deck. Even though his words of reassurance helped David a little bit, they still left him frightnend for Emma more then he was in the beggining of all of this.

He sat down, legs hanging off the deck above the ocean – he loved sitting like that when he was in the navy, then he reached inside his pocket and pulled out a necklace.

It was black, his favourite color, little chains hanged on the side and once the middle is opened on one side there's a pirate ship and a swan next to it, on the other there are letters ingraved.

'And you're mine."

Emma got it to him awhile ago, he kept it in his pocket and always carried it with him. It made him smile every time he felt like crying.

Killian let the sea breeze and the salty smell consume him a bit longer. His face was pale and he was getting more and more terrified by each passing moment.

He isn't OK, and he's not going to be OK for a long time, but he believed in her. He believed in Emma and he believed that she can save herself. Even if they aren't able to get to her, she will find a way to get to them, if some higher force doens't prevent her from doing so.

Having her soul and personality divided in two pieces most definitely won't have a good effect, but she can pull through it. She always did.


	5. Chapter 5

Insomniac VI

_The Prison World._

_Keep in mind I had no time to edit/reread this due to the lack of time on my hands currently. The next chapter should be up sometime next week as soon as I actually write it. I just really hope you're enjoying this because this is my first multi after all._

* * *

„Kellis! You haven't answered any of my damn questions. Who the hell was that and why did she look _excatly_ like you?"

Kellis continued walking and completely ignored all of Emma's words. Emma clenched her jaw over and over again as rage and confusion fumed inside her, and when it started becoming a tad too much, she grabbed Kellis' arm and turned her around so they faced each other.

„Look, I have no time for your silent brooding and hiding things from me crap just tell me who the hell was that, already."

Kellis looked at Emma with admiration at her courage and explosive personality.

„Get your hands off me."

„Tell me what you know."

She ripped away from her tight grip, that will leave quite the mark above her elbow and pulled away. Emma raised her eyebrow and took a step forward, this time lot more gentle then the last and said:

„I'm sorry, look... I have _no_ idea where I am or how long will I be stuck here... But I have a son to get back to. My boyfriend, parents... I need to get back to them, for all they know, I'm dead or gone forever. So please... If there is a way to get back home, and it includes answering who that was, tell me."

Kellis' face softened and she saw that Emma was truly scared and worried that she would lose her family forever. And she understood it. Long time ago she was in the same position as Emma – dropped off in an unknown land forced to adapt to it's rough nature and barely liveable conditions with no telling whether her loved ones were alive or not.

„OK. There may be a way to get back. _May_."

„What is it?"

She sighed, and leaned against the nearest tree then pointed to the log opposite of her for Emma to sit. Once she did, Kellis started talking.

„The woman we saw yesterday in the woods, that was me. Well, _Dark_ me."

„What the hell does that mean?"

„When you land in this world, the Prison, you get divided in two parts – Light and Dark. We're both the Light parts."

„How will that help me get back?"

„If the two parts become one again, you will become one. If your heart leans more towards the darkness, you become the Dark one and you will spend the rest of your life like that, alone, bringing destruction to everything you touch. You become very powerful, but you're forced to spend the rest of eternity here creating a world for yourself no one else can enter. If you lean towards the light, you become both, accepting both parts equally, and you return home."

„Just like that?"

„That's what the legend says..."

„OK so how do I find... me?"

„I don't know. You should be very careful of your desicion, it may not turn out as you have it planned."

„Well my desicion is I'm using the only way I can to get back home. With risk or not."

„It's your choice to make, Emma."

Without a doubt in her mind, Emma already pictured herself safe and at home. She would be sitting on the couch at her parents, snuggled next to Killian while his arm was wrapped tightly around her shoulders, and they'd be watching Henry and Neal play with toy cars.

The near thought of that made her smile and forget for a second that she was far from home and that moment.

Later, they returned to the camp and were both sitting around the fire. Emma leaned her head against her tree while holding her arms crossed to feel warmer. She rubbed her shoulders to get warmer, but there was no use. It was way too cold. The fire made her face seem bright in the night, and the comfort of it made her drift away in her thoughts.

Emma started wondering how Killian was doing, not good for sure. He tried his best to keep her safe and she got ripped away from him once again. Knowing how he is, he probably partially blames himself for this situation.

She would love more then anything to be able to cup his face and to kiss him again until they both weren't able to breathe. She would give anything to have her arms wrapped around him or to hear him make some joke. She would give _anything_ to be just back with him.

Her mind was still focused on him when she closed her eyes with a smile on her face and the memory of his touch on her skin, with his voice gently whispering to her: _„Good night, love."_

But she couldn't fall asleep. There were too many things on her mind. She turned the other way around, so she wasn't facing Kellis, and just stared at the cold nothingness that she could see behind the trees in the distance.

There was only one freaking way to go back, and no second attempt to try again if it doesn't turn out as she wanted it to. The chances were probably not on her side and that terrified her.

The thought of not watching Henry grow up into a beautiful, kind and succesful man terrified her.

The thought of not being able to see Killian again, knowing that they wouldn't get a chance to become what they both always dreamed of becoming, maybe even settle down some time in the future, terrified her.

The thought of never seeing her parents again, and not being able to completely heal their relationship, _terrified her_.

Emma forcefully shut her eyes, trying to make herself fall asleep, but it didn't work. Instead, a tear slowly streamed down her cheek. Then another tear fell down. And another... And another...

Soon, her entire face was damp, and each time she would lick her lips, the bitter and salty taste of her tears would linger on her tongue, reminding her of all the times she spent crying like this as a teenager. She always wondered why no one wanted her and why she was always doomed to be alone and abbandoned, over and over again.

Foster home to foster home, Emma spent most of her nights with her head buried in her pillow and fingers curled into the sheets so no one could hear her sobs in the middle of the night.

Her life made her the way she had to become, it made her push everyone away who tried to get close. Sometimes, she wasn't even aware of her own actions and it made her think what was it that made her so scared to open up.

But now, that she found her family, _found happiness_, she finally understood. Every time she got close, when she loved, those people left. And now it happened again, only this time, she was the one who left.

She found her real family, she found her son, met Killian and fell in love with him, and just when it seemed every piece fell into it's place, this happened.

With all her strength, Emma tried to control herself, tried to _force_ herself to sleep and to stop crying but she simply couldn't. No matter what she tried, tears wouldn't start coming and it became harder and harder for her to keep quiet with each passing second.

Her jaw shook, entire body trembled and her head felt like it was going to blow up. She spent most of the night like that, in tears and fear, but managed to fall asleep sometime before sunrise.

In the morning, Kellis woke Emma up so they would go and get some more food for later.

Still a bit sleepy, and swollen from crying, Emma walked through the forest and tripped a few times over the branches that found themselves in her way, grazing her leg and swearing along the way.

Kellis was silent, like usual. The only times she talked were the answers to Emma's never ending questions. She was a preety calm person, everything seemed unimportant to her. That's probably what 500 years of loneliness do to a person. They just stop caring about what happens next and try to go through with their day.

Somewhere in the meantime of all this mess, Emma started wondering what had Kellis end up here, but never got around to acually asking her. She wasn't even sure if she would get a response either.

Later, when they returned and sat down, tired from the food search, Emma noticed Kellis was shifting uncomfortably, moving her right hip constantly and desperately trying not to touch her ribs.

„Everything OK over there?"

„Yeah, I'm fine."

She raised her eyebrows in an attempt of ignoring the pain she was obviously in but Emma didn't buy it.

„Can I at least take a look at it?"

After a few moments of doubt, Kellis nodded.

Emma approached her and raised her shirt, made of some rough plant which left burn marks on Emma's fingertips, to the top of her rib cage, revealing the wound that turned out to not be life threatning as she first thought.

It was a deep scratch that went from her ribs all the way down to the base of her thigh. If it went any deeper, it could've cut the main artery and that would definitely not be good.

„How'd you get this?"

„Tree. Didn't realize it was this sharp so when I climbed it and tried to get down this happened. It's just a flesh wound."

„It is but, I need something to clean it off with..."

And then she added, almost whispering under her breath:

„Killian's rum would be quite useful right about now..."

„Who is he?"

„Who?"

„Killian? I've heard you say his name."

„When?"

„In your sleep, this morning. And the day before that. Sometimes, you get terrified in your dreams and I can't wake you up. It sounds like you're always watching him die, and you shout for him to come back to you. Who is he?"

„He's my... Boyfriend. The one I mentioned earlier... Will you just stand still?"

Kellis stopped trying to move while Emma ripped a part of her own shirt then threw it into the water she was about to boil so she could use it to press the wound and stop the bleeding later.

„You miss him?"

„Of course I do."

„Is he alive?"

„Yeah."

„Then why do you dream of him dying?"

„Because I once did watch him die. But that happened in another world and he returned... It's a long story. What about you?"

„What about me?"

„Do you miss your family?"

Kellis' face suddenly changed, her body trembled for a second and she looked away from Emma. They both sat in silence for awhile, Emma didn't ask anything and Kellis didn't answer.

She even cleaned her wound completely and protected it with the cloth, but Kellis still didn't answer.

Emma thought she wouldn't anyway so she stepped away to the tree she slept next to and sat down.

„I don't even remember my family anymore... I can't remember their voices... Their faces... Nothing. It's like I never even knew them."

Her eyes were focused on the floor and she didn't move her body for even a milimeter while talking. Her voice wasn't as low as usual and Emma knew how hard this must be for her.

„I do remember that I was with a woman whom I loved more then I ever thought I'm capable of... Her name was Alex. And she's the reason I put myself here."

„What do you mean?"

„One day I woke up in my room, the sun shined so bright on my face and I was so happy that morning. When I opened my eyes and looked around all I saw was what left of my family. All of them were dead, along with half of my hometown. I later learned I was under my own dark impulses and that I was the one who did all that. It took me _so long _to remember all the things I've done and when I did, I learned about this place and without any hesitation, protected everyone else left from me."

„And that's why you never reunited with the other part of you, is it? That was the offer? To unite, become the Dark one and rule this place."

„True. And I'm never going to. If not for me, then for Alex. She would never want me to become the _thing_ that once tore us apart."

Emma looked at her face and saw all her scars at once. Not the visible ones, but the ones carved into her soul who will never heal no matter what. Kellis doesn't trust herself enough to try and get back home, and even if she did, she would be too afraid to be as open about love as she was, even though she, or at least one part of her, never stopped loving.

In silence, Emma finished cleaning her wound then sat back down next to the fire and finished eating some of the pineapples they found.

The Dark part of her is somewhere out there, Emma could feel it in her stomach. Even though she tried to seem confident in front of Kellis, she was absolutely terrified of the whole thing going south and her becoming dark, again. This time, the real Dark One.

She found her strength in her memories and the constant remindment that there is someone waiting for her at home. That she has something to hope for if this works out and that kept her going. They needed her and she needed them.

There are two ways this could go, but only one chance to get back to them and she will take it. Probably.


	6. Chapter 6

Insomniac VII

_Storybrooke._

* * *

It's been weeks since Killian and Charming started following Rumplestiltskin around, looking for answers he may hide about Emma. Week after another only brought more disapointment.

Yesterday, they got the closest for all that time. They followed Rumple through the alley behind his shop but found nothing. No suspicious doings, no one to meet with and nothing that indicates him hiding something Emma releavant from them.

He just stood there for a few mintes and stared towards the back door of the shop and watched Belle and Will walk out. He didn't approach, didn't try to hurt either and after they walked away he did too.

Killian was slowly starting to lose it. Charming pretended to be OK, but he wasn't. Henry and Snow tried to help too, but it was pointless.

„Killian it's going to be alright. We'll find her."

Nervously tapping the desk with his finger, Killian clenched his jaw and inhaled sharply before smacking it and basically jumping out his chair.

„How the bloody hell is it going to be OK? It's been six months. Six _bloody_ months and we're still nowhere, we don't know if Emma is alive or not, we don't know anything!"

„Hook, stop!"

Killian tried to calm himself down by running his fingers through his hair and closing his eyes. He breathed in slowly and once he opened them again he looked at David.

„Sorry. I just... I can't do this anymore. We've been going in circles for far too long and are still on square one... I don't what else to do, we tried everything we could."

„I don't know either..."

Killian soon looked away and headed towards the door.

„Where are you going now?"

„My ship. I haven't slept in three bloody days."

„Really? Your ship."

„Aye, mate. Don't worry, I'm not going after the crocodile alone."

„Alright, I trust you."

Killian gave him a quick smirk then turned around and left. David did believed him, maybe Killian was tired of all this mess after all and just needed a break.

* * *

But Killian lied. Instead of going to his ship, he did the exact thing he said he wouldn't. He went alone after Rumplestiltskin.

Step by another, he was approaching Rumple's hiding place he discovered two days ago but didn't tell anyone but Belle.

Belle found him some magic powder that would be able to knock Rumple out long enough for Killian to tie him up for interrogation.

The place was a little cabin at the edge of town, away from everyone's view. Most of it was hidden by the thick trees but one part sticked out in the road. Rumple was standing in the yard, nervously looking around, like he was excpecting to be attacked at any minute.

Killian approached the house slowly and queitly, with years of sneaking around it was preety easy for him. Under a minute he had already approached the little house.

His hook accidentally scraped the hard old wood on the house, making a sound that was definitely heard, but Rumple didn't even flinch. In his hand, Killian had prepared the powder and the second he was about to pour it over Rumple from behind, Rumple spoke.

„If you want to continue breathing, I suggest you don't do that, dearie."

Killian's eyes automatically shut at the realization that he failed, again. He stepped out of the shadow and approached Rumple. Standing a few feet from him, Killian finally made eye contact.

„So..."

„What do you want Crocodile?"

„Me? Last time I checked, you were creeping upon me."

„You know why I'm here."

„And you know the answer. I can't help you with miss Swan. She's all on her own."

„Why do I not believe you then? Oh that's right, because you're the bloody Dark One and the reason all of this happened. If you didn't make it your mission to turn her dark to get your happiness, Emma would still be here, she would still be OK."

„Oh, I'm sorry I took the object of your affection from you. Sorry you no longer have anyone to chase like a puppy after, pirate."

„You're mistaking me for yourself, Crocodile. I'm not the one who sees people as objects and tools for happiness. I love her. I always chose her and I would always choose her no matter what. Unlike you."

Rumple stood in silence, not having any good words for a reply.

„You're the one who chose loving power over loving the woman who loved you more then anyone and you put her through hell. I don't want Emma back because of me. I want her back because of _her_. She's suffered enough on other people's accounts. She didn't deserve this happening to her. She deserved none of the bad that happened to her. If after all you've done you're still breathing, she bloody well deserves to be happy and with her family."

Killian took a step forward towards Rumple and he didn't even move. Clenching his jaw and fist, Killian kept walking until he was just inches away from Rumple's face.

„I'm giving you your last chanc, Dark One. Tell me how do I find her."

„Or what?"

Killian didn't have an answer. He came her unarmed, alone and unprotected. It was a stupid move, but he had nothing left.

„That's what I thought. You can't get to her. No one can get to her. If miss Swan doesn't find her own way back, she will never be back."

Rumple stepped away and walked around Killian who was left desparate now. He really didn't have anything else to hold on. He can't do anything now. And it crushed him.

„But, however it turns out, you dearie, won't be here to find out."

The moment Killian turned around, Rumple blew him away to the tree next to the house and Killian fell unconscious.

* * *

It was the last thing he rememberred before waking up.

He looked around and he was on the couch, opposite of him sat David who was staring at Killian, preety much looking ready to kill him.

„What the bloody hell happened?"

David didn't look away for a moment, his eyes filled with anger and a few traces of fear and worry as well.

„You were an idiot, that happened. What the hell were you thinking? You could've gotten your self killed."

„I had to..."

„But you didn't! We could've gone together as it was planned and I wouldnt've been forced to make another deal with Rumplestiltskin if you just told the truth."

„You made another deal? Why?"

„What was I suppoused to do? Let you die?"

„But you shouldnt've done that. You have two deals with him now. He will come for you eventually."

David looked away now, trying not to start another fight. Killian continued staring and realized how bad of a situation he put David in.

„I'm sorry, mate. It wasn't my intention to put you through that. And it was all for nothing..."

„What do you mean?"

„Emma... We can't get to her."

„You said Rumple always lies, so why believe him now?"

„The look on his face, right before he threw me into that tree... He had nothing to lose, he was planning on killing me. And what better way to end my life then giving me the solution to what I've been searching for right before ending me? And honestly, I would've been happy to die if it meant you finding out how to get to her and bring her back home. Now we both know that there is nothing else we can do but sit on our asses and wait for her to save herself."

Killian sat back, his eyes slowly filled with tears and he struggled trying to hide them. David sat speechless, his gaze escaping to the table in front of him and he tried his best not to show how he truly felt – broken.

All he ever wanted for Emma was her to be happy and all that kept happening to her through her entire life was the exact opposite.

Suddenly, Killian got up and walked to the door.

„Where are you going now?"

„My ship. For real this time. Later, mate."

Killian made his way back to Jolly preety fast. The weather was terrible and it looked like it was about to rain again. The streets didn't even dry since the last storm.

He entered his quarters and it hit him how big of a mess it was.

Papers everywhere, books laying open all over the floor, his bed sheets were untouched for days but his clothes were all over them. Last he slept was three days ago and it wasn't for a long time either...

He spent that night going through the books Belle gave him over and over again, desperately searching for some clue but found nothing. And sometime before sunrise, he managed to sleep for 2 hours.

Killian felt drained, his body was functioning on coffee and he looked miserable. Today, it got even worse. The back of his head hurt from his fall and it only made his mood worse.

He sat on his bed, empty eyes staring at floor, rage fuming inside of him. His chest felt heavy, his breathing barely doable and he just exploded.

He jumped of his bed, flipping over the night table that stood next to him and then started knocking over everything that was in his way. First the stack of books, then the papers, then the picture that hanged on the wall...

In a few minute span, his room looked like a tornado went through it. Killian just leaned against a wall and sank down to the floor.

He brought his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around them, head falling to his right forearm and he just started crying.

He couldn't stop. Just as he would regain his breath and somewhat control, another wave of tears would hit him and he would start again. All alone, he sat there for God knows how long.

* * *

In the morning, he woke up to the sound of loud knocking on his door and Henry yelling from the other side of them.

„Killian!? Killian, please open up."

Slowly, Killian dragged himself out of the bed, tripped over something he was too tired to recognize and came to the door.

He opened them and saw Henry.

„Morning, lad. What are you doing here?"

„I wanted to check up on you. Grandpa told me what happened with Rumplestiltskin."

Then he just passed Killian and walked in.

„Come in..."

Killian slammed the door shut and walked behind Henry who already ended up in the quarters.

„What happened here?"

„Me."

Henry widened his eyes and then looked back at Killian.

„Can I sit?"

„Of course."

Henry sat on Killian's bed and stared sadly at the floor.

„Are you OK, Henry?"

„No... Do you think she will ever come back?"

„Of course I do. You don't?"

„Really? Because from what it looks like, you're not handling this situation too well either."

Killian noticed Henry's body trembling and him struggling to keep it together, so he put an arm around him and pulled Henry close to him and said:

„Listen, lad. I'm not handling the fact that I can't do anything about this too well. I can't handle sitting here waiting for her to do it all on her own, again. But your mom? I believe in her, and I know you do too, so I know she will find a way back on her own. I always knew that. She'll return to you Henry, don't ever doubt that."

Henry finally hugged him back and they sat there in complete silence, Killian's arm wrapped tightly around Henry's shoulder and both of his wrapped around Killian's body.

„It's going to be OK. It will all be fine Henry. We just have to wait."

* * *

This keeps getting worse, but soon I'm finishing it :)


	7. Chapter 7

Insomniac VIII

The Prison World.

„Alright, so you're gonna need to be very careful when you see her. Try to talk her down slowly, you'll need her consent to unite."

Emma walked behind Kellis as they were getting back with the food, desperately trying to remember all the advices she gave her but forgetting some along the way.

„But how do I find.. her?"

„You're drawn together. Sooner or later she will appear."

„Yeah but how do I know she is here? She could be hiding behind the trees as we speak for all we know. How did you find your other you?"

Kellis gave in to her thoughts for a second and then said:

„Thoughts. I was thinking of why I wanted to be back. I thought about my girlfriend. She was all I had left."

„So why didn't you go back? Or reunited?"

„The other part wished to go back only to bring more destruction. I knew I couldn't trust myself enough to do it. I will rather spend the rest of eternity here then give into the darkness once again. You have no idea what it was like..."

„Tell me."

„What?"

„What it was like. I'm sure you're dying to tell your story to someone after so long."

Kellis smiled, a bit surprised that Emma was interested in her story. After so long, she never had the opportunity to tell it to anyone. It felt refreshing, and it was something she needed to get off her chest.

She stopped for a second, her mind clearly going back to that time. Hand instinctively reaching for her own elbow and her gaze lowering to the ground.

Emma knew that pattern, what Kellis felt. That was shame.

„You lose every single feeling that was ever familar to you. Not even the breeze running over your skin feels the same. And the weight of the bad things you did? It's all gone. No remorse, no pain, no love, _nothing_. Just plain emptiness that pushes you to cause more evil, to hurt more people, even the ones you love the most. And when you get back to being yourself... Well that's when it all hits you at rush of guilt sending chills through your whole body... The overwhelming fear that you'll do it again... Every nerve in your body pushing you to run away from everyone... And then you do, because you know it's for the best. Trust me you don't want it, you don't wanna be the Dark One. Ever."

The momentary darkness Emma experienced was preety much nothing compared to being the Dark One. Emma was aware of her magic abilities and how strong they are, and the story made it a bit harder for her to be a hundred percent certain she'll be able to do this.

Even 500 years later, Kellis is still broken and filled with nothing but guilt of what she's done. Her demons never stopped haunting her. What would happen to her?

Emma entered the Jolly Roger and immideatly headed to Killian's room. He was sitting at his desk, with his rum bottle in hand and stared at the wall.

„Hey."

„Hey, Swan. What are you doing here?"

„I don't know. I just thought of you when I went to sleep, about how much I wanted to see you again, and here I am. Am I dreaming?"

„Probably."

He smiled at her. _God_, how she missed his smile. Her mood immideatly changes for the better when she sees those dimples appear on his face.

„What's wrong, love?"

She walked up to him, his arm immideatly reached around her, pulling her closer to him, and she just sat in his lap, leaning her head on his shoulder.

Surprised, but also pleased, Killian kissed her head gently, smiled, and pulled her closer to him, wrapping both of his arms around her and she just relaxed like that. She felt so safe in his arms.

„Is everything OK, Swan?"

„I just really miss you."

„I do too. When are you coming back?"

„I don't know if I am. All this time I was convinced I had it in me, that I could easily return home to you and Henry and mom and dad... But now I'm not so sure."

He lowered his gaze and looked at her, a bit confused, and she looked back.

„Why is that."

„I don't know. I'm scared. Scared I'll mess it up and won't return."

„You won't mess it up, love. You're the most determined person I've ever met. You can do this. Come home to us."

He smiled and she smiled back. A bit reassured but still filled with all kinds of doubts.

„How is Henry doing?"

„He's alright. He is your son after all. There hasn't been a day he hasn't tried to do something to help you, and he never lost faith. He misses you so much love. And he needs you. If you have a way to get back, take it. You've nothing to lose."

Neither of them talked for a minute. Emma snuggled into his chest and he pressed another kiss to her forhead.

„And how are you doing?"

„When I'm able to hug you... Kiss you... Hold you... And to see you again, just like this, I'll be alright. Don't worry about me, Emma. Whenever you return, I'll be here, waiting. No matter how long. Just remember that I love you."

Her face softened and she smiled. His touch and words felt real even when they weren't.

„I love you too."

She moved away from his chest only to press a gentle kiss to his lips and lean her forhead to his. Her hand reached to his face and she kissed him again.

And again, and again. She moved her leg across him and straddled his lap, kisses becoming more and more passionate and he just gave in. She could feel him smiling into their kisses.

His hand reached her back and gently slided down them over and over again. Her arms wrapped tightly around his neck and only moved away when he took off her jacket.

The last thing she rememberred before waking up was them falling on the bed, giggling.

Still under the influence of her dream, Emma walked through the forest with a smile. After so long, she actually _smiled_.

The weather was bearable, not too hot like usual, and she felt happy.

Kellis asked:

„Are you sure about this?"

„I think so. Yeah."

„Good, because there's no second chance. You either get this right or not."

Their conversation was interrupted by the rustle that came from the trees on their left. Kellis didn't hear it immideatly but Emma did.

She immideatly stopped Kellis and gestured with her hand to keep quiet. The noise repeated, this time much quieter. Whoever it was, they were watching Emma and Kellis.

Then the noise stopped. They stood there, waiting for it to start again but it didn't. So they continued walking, with much more attention the before.

Emma was almost certain that the person creeping upon them behind the trees was her. Well other her. Every humming noise she heard since had her turning around and looking over everything that was in her horizon but found nothing.

Later when they returned to the camp, they noticed someone already sitting there on a log beside the fire. The side of her blonde hair shined under the reflection of the fire and Emma already tried to sneak up to her.

„Don't bother. Just come and sit so we can talk like civilized people."

Emma walked over, but Kellis stayed in her place. Emma sat opposite herself and just looked at her. It was creepy. Seeing someone looking excatly the same as you, every detail of her face, every curve every lock of her hair... Everything looked excatly the same.

„How'd you find this place?"

„It didn't take a genius to figure out. You just look for the place where you hear noise, see fire and go there. I found this place days ago."

„What are you doing here? What do you want?"

„The same as you. To reunite."

„That's crap. What's in it for you?"

„Get tons of power and bring detruction."

„You really think you'll be the one who's stronger?"

„I know I am. I know you don't really want to get back there only to be forced to deal with the next mess that comes. I know that that one, tiny, insecure part of you doesn't want to go back for the possibility of you going crazy again and hurting everyone you love. I know you don't want to go back only to continue to fulfill the saviour's duty again. Make everyone happy, right? What's in it for you, Emma? Everyone excpects you to make things right for them and you never have the time to make it right for yourself. You want something consistent, a calm situation where you have everything under control, something that doesn't go away. This is it. Stay here."

Kellis shifted from her left leg to her right and queitly, almost like a whisper, said:

„Emma... Don't..."

Everything she just heard was right. She really was terrified.

„What about Henry? Killian? Mom? Dad? Did you really stop caring for them? Just like that? Do you really think they don't need me. Dealing with new mess is hard and it's crap, yes. Being the saviour is hard, yes. One tiny part of me is scared, yes. But also one huge part is sure as hell that I can do anything to stop it from happening again. I have a family, now - a son, a guy I love, a baby brother, I'm reunited with my parents. That was all I could ever ask for. So why would I stay here only to be alone, again?"

The other her just sat still, gaze lost somewhere in the flames and she didn't say a word. Then she just started fading. She didn't speak a word and she just disappeared into nothingness.

Emma jumped from her seat and immideatly turned to Kellis.

„What the hell just happened?"

„You did it. You won."

„Then why am I still here?"

„I don't know."

Not even a two seconds later, a loud explosion was heard and they both turned around. A portal opened right behind Emma.

Her confused face suddenly turned into a bright one, shining with hope and she smiled. She was going home.

„Well what are you waiting for?"

„Kellis, I can't just leave you here."

„You have to. You have your world to get back to. That's not my world. This is."

„No..."

„It has to be that way. I'll be OK, don't worry. Maybe one day I'll have enough courage to do the same as you. Now, go!"

Emma glanced at her one last time, still feeling guilty for leaving her alone here.

„Take care of yourself."

„I will. You too."

Emma nodded and then jumped into the portal.


	8. Chapter 8

Insomniac IX

Storybrooke. Alrighty then, so the mostly crappy build up is finished and this is the final chapter I truly hope you like.

Emma landed on a meadow, somewhere far in the woods, long way from home. She looked around and finally saw something familiar.

She rememberred these woods from the chase after Will stole something from Granny's and she and David had to chase him all the way to here and back to the station. She immideatly started running back to her house.

Tired, hungry and mentally exhausted, she wanted nothing more then to see her family again, lay in her bed and sleep for a few days.

It's been a few months and Henry has probably grown even more. She just wondered how he took the news of her disappearing. Certainly not good, but he's a strong boy and he probably found a way to deal with it. He had a family to find comfort in and her to believe in.

Her parents were probably falling apart on the inside but tried to seem like they had it all under control. Her dad especially. They had to for Henry.

And Killian? He probably took it the worst. She knew how terrified he was of losing her and then he did. Her last words to him lingered in her thoughts through all these months. Even now.

'I love you.'

There were so many opportunities she could've told him and she chose the most painful one. When she watched him die, she was completely broken he never found out that she loved him and she sure as hell wasn't going to have him go through the same.

She didn't know what would happen to her, whether she will live or die and she didn't care. She just needed him to know it.

* * *

After about an hour of running, she was finally on the main road and much closer to home. Already familiar buildings started appearing, some lights stil turned on even when it was probably really late and mostof the town was asleep.

Streets were completely empty, and the chilling sea breeze was almost terrifying when you're walking all alone and only got a thin sweater on you.

Once she _finally_ got close enough to the Granny's, she thought she saw a dark figure standing leaned against the wall of a building. And she wasn't wrong.

Only to make it better, it was Killian standing there. On her tired face suddenly appeared a huge smile when she saw him. Her eyes basically shined underneath the moonlight and a tear appeared in each. She tried to stop it, but one slided slowly down her cheek, leaving a tickling and bitter trace when it brushed her lip.

She cleared her throath, making her voice seem deeper then it was and finally spoke:

„Um, excuse me sir, is everything OK?"

Too tired to turn around, or too uninterested, Killian just reached up and scratched his ear, still turned away from Emma.

„Aye... Just thinking."

Her voice wanted to crack. She was on the edge of screaming and jumping right at him.

„About what?"

„It doesn't matter. What the bloody hell are you doing here at this time of the night?"

Emma couldn't play anymore. She cleared her throath again, and then started talking with her normal voice.

„I could ask you the same thing, Killian."

Her voice sent chills through his entire body at once. He immideatly straightened up and slowly started to turn around.

Once his gaze met hers, he was left speechless. She looked like an angel, just as he rememberred. Her long blonde hair seemed softer then usual, her face tired but still breathtaking, eyes shining from the tears she is clearly holding back and her lips creating a smile that could heal an entire soul.

„Swan?"

He whispered, voice getting lost in the breeze but Emma's smile and his surprise never faded away. She was standing just a few feet away from him, _finally_.

Emma ran to him, jumping and wrapping her legs around his waist in her leap and wrapped her arms around his neck. He pulled her even closer when his arms embraced her tightly, and then he started laughing. Laughing with relief that he's finally holding her again and that she is safe.

_She is fine._

„I missed you so much."

He buried his head in the crook of her neck, leaving a trale of kisses all the way up her jaw to once he finally reached her lips. She climbed of him, but never moved her hands away from his neck or her lips from his, who still had traces of rum lingering on them.

„You've no bloody idea how much I've missed you, love. I couldn't bear the possibility of living without you for so long."

„Me neither. Trust me."

They both laughed at the same time, and Emma couldn't get the smile of her face whenever she saw Killian grinning at her, again.

„You're shieviring. Here."

He took of his jacket and wrapped it around her.

„Better, Swan?"

„Much."

She smiled and kissed him again, leaning into his tight hug.

„Come on, Swan. Let's get you home."

* * *

After busting into the Charming's residence at 1am and explaining _a lot_ of things, Emma and Killian stayed sitting on the couch.

Henry was still over the moon to have his mom back and he didn't care how she got back. He just cared that she did.

Her parents were just as thrilled and relieved, Snow actually hugged her so tightly she was probably gonna have som bruises left on her back. Charming picked her up and then hugged her for a long time. They couldnt've been happier that their girl came home again.

„Aren't you tired, Swan?"

Emma moved closer to Killian, his arm falling lower down her body and he kissed her forhead. She closed her eyes and simply enjoyed the moment.

„I am, trust me. But I like it this way."

„I can go back to my ship now, and then come again tomorrow when you're rested."

„You're not going anywhere."

„You need to rest, Swan."

„I am resting."

„Alright then."

Killian got up and picked Emma up.

„What the hell are you doing?"

„Taking you to your bedroom. You need sleep."

„Only if you're staying with me. I'm not letting you out of my sight, OK?"

„As you wish, milady."

They climbed upstairs and Killian layed her down gently on her bed. He took off his shoes and jacket then layed next to her, wrapping her arm around her and pulling her close.

„I like this."

„Me too, love. You've no clue how much."

They just stayed silent for a minute, both enjoying the comfort of each other's bodies and the softness of the bed. Then Killian asked:

„Are you alright?"

„Mostly. You?"

„I am now. I just needed you to be safe and alive."

They both took deep breaths, and moved closer to each other. Killian noticed Emma still shivering and he started rubbing her back with his hand, trying to get her warmer. They stayed like that in silent for awhile until Killian decided to say:

„You know, there was a moment I thought I'd never see you again... I _never_ stopped believing in you and I tried to stay strong, but I just lost all hope at one point."

Emma was first saddened by his words, rememberring how for a moment she felt the same. But then she smiled and looked up to him and said:

„Don't you know Killian? I'm a survivor."

He laughed and then kissed the top of her head.

„Aye. Do you know what bothered me most this entire time?"

„What?"

„That you sacrificed yourself before I could tell you something important."

Emma got really worried now. She picked her head up and looked at Killian, completely confused. Then he said:

„That I love you."

Emma's confusion faded away quickly and was replaced by the most adorable smile. She pressed her lips to his and kissed him passionately. Then, just milimetres away from his face, she whispered with a tear sliding down her cheek:

„I love you too."

They spent the rest of the night and most of the day like that. Wrapped safely in each other's arms with smiles on their faces. Both finally sleeping normally again.

* * *

**The end.**

_Reviews? _


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